I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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