Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
