is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Who died my cat blue again?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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