M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
