May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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