I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I skipped work to stalk him.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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