i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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