the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
