It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I will be naked everywhere
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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