TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
