we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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