we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
