is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
