Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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