i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
