so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
