im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
