im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
