I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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