just come out here and I will go home with you...
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i was born a porn star she said
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize