The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
