Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
