Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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