you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
