Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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