he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
smell my finger.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
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