Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
