i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
