what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
