I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
