i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Randomize
