Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
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