im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
