I'll bet she douches with gravy.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize