i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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