thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
