C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
