So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Randomize
