i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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