I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
