You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
