He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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