The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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