Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
