You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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