my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
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