My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
