i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
