Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Green mimosas i think yes
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
