Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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